You make me feel so...

This is certainly going to be an incredibly whiny and likely intolerable post. Just understand I am in no way asking for a boyfriend. I don’t really care to have one right now, thanks so much. I was just thinking and this is what comes of that.

Have you ever had people tell you that they really admire you? I think most people have probably had it said to them at some point, but this is all just speculation. For me, I love it and it makes me get all these warm fuzzies. Hooray. That’s great news. The only thing is, it is quite often eligible young men who tell me this. And they use that exact word, “admire.” I would never want to give them cause to stop feeling that way about me, but it would be nice if they would do some other things too.

R-E-S-P-E-C-T. I don’t think it means anything special to me. Same as everyone else, I like it. I suspect that I’m not different in thinking that part of respect is keeping your word. Yeah, that would be nice too.

Also related to respect is friendship. I value my close friends a lot. It is you who have kept me on my feet through things I would never tell you about. Having said that, too often people seem to let their friendship with me get one sided. That is, I’m the one who starts a conversation with you. I make sure you are doing well. I offer my ear and my hands when things aren’t going exactly the way you want. Can I please be able to expect the same from you?! (Wow that sounds really biased. Well, I am writing from my perspective.)

The last point I’m going to make before I regret writing this. Oh man this is bad. I’m just gonna say it. LIKE ME! Yeah, a crush. I know it’s more of a girl thing to talk about, but guys have crushes too. Now, I am in no way saying that all my guy friends should like me in that way or even that every guy who admires me should have a crush on me. What I am saying is this. If I am so admirable (which I honestly don’t think I would ever say that I am) why don’t any guys like me? Seriously, the dirty little secret you get to know about Carrotsoda is this: no guy has ever admitted to liking me at all. At least not that I’ve heard of. Am I just to good for everyone? Of course not, but sometimes I feel like a person who everyone thinks well of and nobody actually wants to be around.

You know what, I think I’ll strike everything I just said. I don’t care if you like like me. But please, take me out for icecream or invite me to go hiking or play a board game or something. I think very few things make me feel as special as when a nice guy dedicates his time to me. I think that’s true of most girls, which means guys, you have a lot of power for good. USE IT PLEASE.

Well, that was a round about way of getting to it, but I think that last point is what I was getting at. Guys who make girls feel special…well…

Because I'm Selfish: My birthday wish list way in advanced

Black clothing. Specifically t-shirts, leggings, socks, dress pants. Those all need to be black.

New tennis shoes. Do you realize how quickly you wear through shoes when you walk everywhere?

More non-knee socks. I love knee socks, but I'm pretty well covered in that department.

Exercise pants and capris. When you have dance class every day, the three pairs you have tend to get very gross.

Otherwise clothing. Like mostly Sunday type clothes.

Quarters. Laundry. 'nough said about that.

Otherwise money. For textbooks and food and rent and such.

Notebooks and folders. Two of my favorite thing.

A small, inconspicuous, plain colored purse. I confess their usefulness.

A netbook, maybe.

4 black jubilee dance floor tiles. Kinda steep.


Yeah, that's pretty much what I want. I probably end up getting it all for myself before too long. My treat to me.